External Muntication

From WikiForAll

External Muntication is an intentional bastardisation of Matthew Iselins short story Internal Corruption. External Muntication contains the general backbone of Iselins original story, but is completely changed in character and understandability. While Iselins version was focused on actually making sense and being a story, External Muntication was focused on making as little sense as possible while still containing whole sentences. This goal was completely achieved.

Contents 1 Characters 2 Structure 3 The Response 4 The Aftermath

Characters

While James de Vries, who rewrote the story as External Muntication, tried to give each character an equal part, there were some who missed out entirely just because Matthew gave them little to no part in the original.

This space is dedicated to them, to give them a moment in the spotlight that was taken from them:

Jessica Cavaye, Amelia Tuffley, Harry Hsieh, Aaron Coleman, I can't believe you're trying to read this text. Get a hobby. Now.

Structure

The structure, or lack thereof, is quite unique. While most parodies make an obvious rip-off of the original in an attempt to make fun of it, External Muntication was an attempt to simply drown the story in funnies without changing what it was. This pattern is followed throughout most of the story, except shortly after an action sequence between the two main characters James de Vries and Aaron Dickinson, in which James realised he had gone too far, and that the story was beyond repair. But since he needed the story intact to finish his work, he needed to find a way to remedy the situation. To this end, rather than deleting his hard work, he simply wrote in the following paragraph, the likes of which have never been seen before. And for a damn good reason too.

It was at this moment that something very important happened. The world froze, everything, the rubble, the dust, Kaitlyn, Aaron, the traffic, the birds outside. Everything. The metronome by which the whole universe times its actions had been stopped, and there was nothing anybody could do about it. The reason that this was such an important moment, is this was the moment that the Author realised that he had gone too far in screwing up the story, and that he could no longer screw up the ending because it just wouldn’t fit. So, through a total abuse of his authorly powers, he had frozen time while he decided what to do, and decide he did.

... At about exactly the same time as when the time was frozen, chronologically, is the time that the characters were plonked – against all common sense – in their original positions. [the positions they were in at that time in the original story]

He effectively reset the story to it's original position, and used this paragraph to give the readers a semblance of an excuse as to why he did it. This creative use of breaking the fourth wall is what separates this story from being a rave rather than actually having a structure, making sense, or bearing a resemblance of normalcy.

The Response

External Muntication got raving reviews, and there were lots of people trying to steal bits of it over MSN while the author worked on it. James de Vries commented on the matter:

"I gave them little bits as I went just to shut them up. I didn't want to give them anything, but if you were up against people that noisy you'd have given them something too. I refused to give them anything more than that because the last thing i want is for them to read it and not find it funny because they'd already been given all the good bits over the internet."

He then went on to say that he actually crapped himself laughing more times than he could count on his fingers during the making of the story.

"I felt like Valve studios: I said i'd release it one time, but really it was twelve and a half years AFTER the stated release date that it went public. Now i know what they mean when they say 'the official release date is when it's done'. They mean they couldn't be stuffed and they'd rather have a drinking competition, because they get paid equally whether they can talk legibly or not."

The Aftermath

After experiencing the awesomeness of having people hanging on every word, James got greedy from all the attention and decided he needed to produce more funnies. As a result, he created himself an MSN display picture in which he cut out his own forehead and replaced it with nuts. It was labelled May Contain Nuts. The culmination of this quest for funny coincided with a chemistry project that requested him to create a comic, and finally Teh Comick was born.

External muntication is effectively the starting point of James' career in making people rofl.